Ugh

So I've had to go back to the ER several times for my 'unexplainable pains'. The doctors have told me that if I start my period soon, that means it was cysts rupturing. I have started bleeding today but I have also stopped. This helps to give evidence of the cysts but also does not explain the pains. Ah, I'm just so tired of not feeling well. I have to wait for the doctors to get their thumbs out of their asses and fix me. Doubt it will happen since it's been so long already but all I can do is hope. I'm going to Enid hopefully Wednesday to get my insurance cards again. Then I can go see someone else to try to explain my pains. I don't know what to do. I'm hurting and its effecting my work, my mood, my everything. I'm looking for another job. Still have not gotten any responses. I tried to become a manager at my apartment complex but my application was denied and they hired someone else. I'm so angry about not being able to get that job but I guess its because something better is coming along. I just wish it would hurry up and get here so that I can stop worrying about money and such. Sykes blows. It honestly is horrible. I feel worse every time I go there. Everyone I know is looking for a job out of there. I'm just hoping and praying for something to come along to help me out. I need a job that can accomodate my breast-feeding my son and can work around my doctors visits and pains. I know I'm asking a lot but I don't know what else to do. I'm just trying to survive and hang on. I'm good on my bills until October so that's an amazing feat for me (of which I'm very proud of) but I am looking into the future trying to make sure that I can make ends meet.

A bit about the last year or so

My last post April 25th, 2010 states that I didn't know if I was going to remain pregnant or not. I didn't. I miscarried a child at 12 weeks. Almost exactly a month after I found out about the miscarriage I became pregnant again. I was very worried that I would lose that one as well. A lot of very stressful things were going on. My husband and I were discussing divorce and we weren't sure if we were going to get back together. My husband and I are still working on our issues but we are currently still apart, although it's not a choice either of us made. I am happy to say that I was able to carry to term and I now have a handsome son named Draedyn Caoimhin Cummings. He is a happy baby like his sister, Enya. I moved to Shawnee, KS and then back to Ponca City, OK. I am working out at Sykes again although I completely hate it. Draedyn refuses to take a bottle so it's making work even harder. I am very confused and am not in the greatest health. I recently found out that I have cysts on my ovaries. My left ovary is covered in cysts one of which is half the size of the ovary and when I recently had an ultrasound to find out why I had so much pain, the doctors couldn't find my left ovary. My right one is now half the size that it's supposed to be. I am constantly in pain and there is nothing that can be done about it due to me breast-feeding.
I love being with my children and I'll post more about them at another time.